I live in Bronx County, which is part of the five boroughs of New York City, in the United States. A few days ago, I left my job and took the D train to the station that stops near my home. It is the train that transports me from the Bronx to Manhattan, where my job is located. On the way, there was a situation where two people had differences related to the violation of personal space; they had a discussion. I call the discussion a "War of Words"; it happened in front of all the people who were in the same train car. Thank God, there was not a violent confrontation. During the battle of words, I was watching and paying close attention to what was happening. When I left the station and walked to my house, I had some reflective thoughts on the event. I like to try to learn something from any situation in which I find myself. I will never forget the phrase that says "Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about; be kind. Always.” The train experience and this phrase grew into the thoughts I will share with you now.
Words are invisible steel arrows. They exceed the speed of light when it comes to penetrating into a human being. They have the negative ability of giving birth to war, death, rancor, hatred, and sadness, among others events and emotions. In turn, they also have the ability to create peace, hope, forgiveness, life, love, etc… These two different angles can be viewed with the following 3 points: From whom the words come from, the manner they are spoken, and the intention behind the words.
1. From whom the words come from.
Words can come from anywhere, any corner or avenue. In most cases, they do not have great power over us. But those who have the greatest influence are from our loved ones, not an unknown person. And why is that? The reason is because we care about those people, we love them and we have a great appreciation for everything related to them. These people know us; they have knowledge of some of our faults and virtues. Therefore, it causes us to defend and protect our "SELF-IMAGE".
If we compare the words of an unknown person and a loved one, the beloved individual surpasses in weight and value. Similarly, the words of a person whom one admires also surpass those of a stranger.
2. The manner it is spoken.
You do not need to use bad words to be able to cause emotional damage to someone. It can be done without curses, with other words that transfer venom, sarcasm, and/or bullying. Also, the intonation and energy that mixes in can have a significant effect on people. Words with emotion may be more deadly than the poison of a black widow. Conversely, it can be the light and vitamin that helps a human being to be the best version of himself or herself.
The important thing is not what is said, is it how you say it. You can realize this in the interpretation of a song by a singer. In the three, four or five minutes of a song, they can cause us to generate different emotions created by the thoughts developed in the interpretative process. There is a mixture of musical instruments, words, physical expressions and different intonations that makes this happen.
Here is a link from the singer called Jessie J. She is performing live her song titled "Who You Are".
3. The intention behind the words.
The reason behind the words is the most critical factor and defines its power. My two questions would be: "Where do you want to lead the listener? What is the goal?” The intention may be to destroy or to build. It all depends on the person. Sometimes the reason can be misinterpreted if the words are not the correct ones to make the message clearly understood.
We have all been victims or perpetrators of misused words
As you know, some people do not know how to communicate the message they want to convey. We may lack adequate words to give a clear message; therefore, we use others that are not suitable. This can cause confusion and harm to other individuals. Despite that, it is important we understand that no one is perfect. At some point in our lives, we have all caused an emotional wound to another. Error is a step each of us has to experience in different areas of our lives. It is necessary to make errors in order to learn. At the moment you become aware that what was said was damaging, the best medicine is to apologize immediately. Such action on your part demonstrates your level of maturity, respect and the value you place on the relationship.
If someone, be it a friend, teacher, boyfriend, girlfriend, manager, co-worker, etc. said something that made you feel bad, you can communicate how you feel so you do not harbor negative energy towards them. The goal is to feel good, and not create a grudge in your heart. Many people say things using words that flatten the level of emotion of others. Their intentions were probably not to make them feel bad, but to communicate something to them. The moment you decide to talk to that person and share your feelings, you let them see what they did not see, and thus provide a learning moment. But, if that person continues to do you harm verbally, I can confirm something. I believe a human being is defined the moment he or she begins to speak and take action. That shows who they are. The world has a wide variety of people, with different thinking, cultures and beliefs. Many will try to cause people to fail, and use all kinds of words in order to promote their own success. We have to face them in a positive way; the words of others do not define who we are. Today I recommend you evaluate these relationships and limit the time you spend with people who are not suitable for you, because over time they can negatively affect you in everything. You are the captain of your life. And you have the last word.
I hope this writing helps you. This topic is very broad and can go in many different directions. If you have any questions, or if you want me to expand more on one of the points, feel free to send a message to my email, Samuelynoa889@gmail.com
I wish you a nice day.